lolz at zach: December 2005

Movie Review

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Breaking News

Mona Lisa is smiling because she is 83% happy.
She is also "9% disgusted, 6% fearful and 2% angry. She was less than 1% neutral, and not at all surprised."
Source: Scientists Figure Out Why Mona Lisa Smiles

In other news, Mr. Tickle remains 2,000% overjoyed.
Source:

Weather SmackDown!

Farewell (Officially)

By not offering salary arbitration to Mike Piazza at last night's midnight deadline, the Mets have officially cut ties with their all-star catcher. The Mets are now not allowed to sign Piazza to a contract until May 1st, and he most surely will sign with an American League team before then. The Angels, A's, and Twins are currently looking like his best suitors, who can use him to their advantage as a designated hitter. It is clear that Piazza's best days as a position player are behind him. This hardly comes as a shock, however, as Piazza spent most of his final game at Shea Stadium on October 2nd blowing kisses and waving goodbye the the crowd. Piazza is, without a shadow of a doubt, a future Hall-of-Famer. He is the greatest hitting catcher of all time with 397 home runs, well over 1000 RBI, and a career .311 batting average.

The question remains whether Piazza will be enshrined in the hall as a Los Angeles Dodger or a New York Met. There are arguments on both sides. True, Piazza did emerge a superstar with the Dodgers. It was there that he had the best season of his career - in 1997 he hit .362 with 40 home runs and 124 RBI - and nearly won the MVP award. In fact, he probably would have won it if it was known then that Ken Caminiti was using steroids. Piazza also won the 1993 Rookie of the Year award in Los Angeles batting .318 with 35 home runs and 112 RBI.

Then there is the debate for Piazza to remain an immortal Met. He is arguably the greatest player in franchise history, along with Hall-of-Fame pitcher Tom Seaver. In 1998, when he came to the Mets via a trade, he quickly signed a 7-year contract extension, and instantly made the Mets a legitmate contendor. He gave the Mets an identity and a face for the organization. The following two years, Piazza led the Mets to the post-season, something he did not do with the Dodgers. They are the only two consecutive playoff years in the ballclub's history. In 2000, the team made it all the way to the World Series under Piazza's leadership, ultimately losing the crosstown Yankees.

One of Piazza's most memorable moments came near the end of the 2001 season. On September 21st, at the first professional sporting event in New York City following 9/11, the Mets were playing the rival Braves. At the time, the Mets were in the middle of a dramatic comeback towards the top of the division after a mostly a disappointing season. This game was tremendously important in all of New York City. In the 8th inning, with the Mets losing 2-1, Piazza blasted a two-run homer to straightaway centerfield putting the Mets ahead. It was an extraordinarily dramatic moment, and I have never felt goosebumps like that watching any other game.

Mike Piazza is a superstar ballplayer, a class act, and is responsible for changing the face of the New York Mets organization forever. He'll be missed.

Got a favorite Mike Piazza memory? Put it in the comments!

Previously
Piazza encourages use of fedora hats on trains
Red Sox fans are oblivious of Mets fans

Gravitas

Don't miss this great interview with Stephen Colbert from the Terry Gross show on NPR. The audio is nearly 40 minutes long, and gives some great insight into the preparations and origins of the show, as well as including some clips from actal episodes. The Colbert Report has certainly come into its own with nearly 25 aired shows to its credit, and should be required viewing for anybody with a brain and a basic cable. Those only with basic cable and no brain need not apply.

It's the Great Hannukah Miracle, Charlie Brown!

I don't care what you say, if you don't watch ABC at 8:00pm this evening then you just don't like great things. Tonight marks the 40th annual broadcast of the famous A Charlie Brown Christmas special. Fuck, I'm Jewish, and even I cry at this program which quotes scripture and uses blatant religious references. Perhaps it is the lack of a laugh track, the use of real kids' voices, the trombone for the schoolteacher, or that majestically haunting jazz score by Vince Guaraldi which has become second nature as part of our collective musical lexicon. Everybody knows the theme to "Linus and Lucy," which has become known as sort of the theme song to the Peanuts.

Guaraldi did the score for fifteen successive "Peanuts" specials, and then died of a heart attack in 1976, on the same day he'd finished recording the soundtrack for It's Arbor Day, Charlie Brown. Nevertheless, tonight's special is just that -- special. Tonight's airing will feature a never-before-seen (according the ABC's website) collection of Peanuts shorts, based on the strips of Charles Schulz, called Charlie Brown Christmas Tales. Try to catch it tonight, and I dare you not to get nostalgic and cry.

8:00pm - A Charlie Brown Christmas, ABC

MP3: Vince Guaraldi Trio - Linus and Lucy

New Blood

New Blood
Originally uploaded by sgtpepperzl.

Student Valley Productions is stronger than ever. All three troupes remain on the same plateau, dominating the Herter stage with consistently hilarious comedy shows. This weekend in particular has featured some tremendous highlights:

Toast! founder Andy Hobgood flew in from Chicago to fuck around, lead some workshops, and pretend he's allergic to alcohol.

IWA debuted three new, very strong performing cast members - BENNY OYAMA, NICK KVILHAUG (seen above on the right about to make out with Brennan), and EVAN BOSHI. All three amazed the crowd with clever scenework and powerhouse jokes.
Mission: IMPROVable debuted three new, very strong performing cast members - CARDIGAN (previously known in IWA as Brennan Clark), HOLLYWOOD (previously known in IWA & Sketch-22 as Natalie Baseman), and LE BARON (previously known in, um.. life as Dave Collamore). All three participated in the short-form improv game known as 101.

Scott Braidman and Rachel Cummings told me of their plans to move to New York City this summer.
Sidenote: Be sure to check out Scott in an absolutely ridiculous Dumbledoresque beard in the previous photos.

I saw The Squid & The Whale, which you must buy a ticket for, if you haven't already. My favorite film since last summer's Broken Flowers. It captures some family dynamics pretty damn perfect, and might be the most well-communicated movie I've ever seen.